Torquay United Fans Forum

hector wrote:My uncle always relays a tale from Plainmoor in the 50s or 60s, where in the old Cowshed at the Ellacombe (Pre-Mini Stand apparently), a stray shot hit a man in the head and bounced over the stand to the area where the swimming pool is.

When the ball was hit back over from someone outside, it apparently hit the same man on the head again, on the way back in. Sounds a bit urban myth to me but my uncle often repeats this tale and swears it's true.

Modgull wrote:
Well done all who went. Overall the crowd was 3,700 (3,300 home) which is cr*p for a Club who are top by a country mile on a bank holiday. If it had been the other way round we would have had well over 4,000.

Tough result - still, even if we lose against FGR it will still be 3 points more than I thought we'd get over the holiday period. Upwards and onwards but big shame about Richards!

madgull wrote:How about this to please all the fickle fans?

'Dear supporters,

We on the board would like to apologise for the performance of an inexperienced, underpaid group of youngsters that we managed to cobble together on the shoestring budget imposed on us due to the ineptitude of our last board. We will be ensuring that Kev fines the culprits responsible for the goals and knocks every last bit of confidence out of them on the training ground on Monday.

We will also be using the not-so-great amount that we currently have in the players fund with immediate effect to sign five new players, each on a princely sum of £80pw. Unfortunately, they have all come from the South Devon Schools League, as we ballsed up and couldn't get Lionel Messi to agree on image rights.

We'd like to offer all supporters free entry to the next five home games in the hope that we don't go bankrupt in the meantime, and we will be installing a £20,000 Opus soundsystem at Plainmoor to pump out some tunes and raise the atmosphere at home games.

To enhance your match day experience further still, we are recruiting cheerleaders from the young mum's association of Torbay, we trust you will enjoy their displays of synchronised smoking and all-action, high-flying heroin injection.

Oh, and having read the 'Dear Kevin Nicholson' thread, we are also delighted to announce that KN has agreed to abandon all ball control, phase of play, passing, shooting, heading, shadow play and every other type of training that isn't dedicated to defending set pieces. We will be introducing a high-tech system of cattle prods to encourage the players to mark better.

Meanwhile, as we want to take our fans' input on board, please email us at [email protected] to suggest to us which of players are not, in fact, professional footballers and merely con artists masquerading as such. Each week, we'll sack the player with the most votes. If you have picked the sacked player, you'll be entered into a prize draw to hand-deliver his P45!!!

COYY!

Lots of love, hugs and kisses,

The Board

brucie wrote:No you are quite right it doesn't actually cost me that much - more like £45 odd I suppose. Its not a question of having the last laugh or particularly the money really.
Believe me I don't want the team to lose as I say everytime my phone alert goes off you can guarantee the opposition have scored which is really quite depressing.
Its just not worth the time and effort.
Look at the crowd yesterday - nigh on 2000. I know there were a few visiting fans there but that's more than half of what some teams in this league get and we cannot compete with anyone.
I havn't got anything against Nicholson but really his appointment is laughable (or it would be if there was anything to smile about)
Playing himself yesterday was ludicrous - all we have in the dugout is Kenny fecking Veysey who is useless as well. He is supposed to be coaching Speiss (and indeed Rice last season) but they never get any better.
Dave Phillips seems a nice guy - but genuinely I don't think him and Steve Breed could run a piss up in a brewery.
The whole shebang is a three ringed circus if ever there was one.
Some people were saying that Hurst was strolling around yesterday - if that's true what a disgraceful attitude that is.
Can anyone actually see us getting a point from a game let alone three cause I can't.
It is an unmitigated disaster.

nickbrod wrote:Nico might turn out to be a brilliant manager but not with this group of players.

PlainmoorB0b wrote:Just feel really sad tonight.

It's only a matter of time before the incredible supporters begin to turn on the players, one of which is now the manager, and the atmosphere will become toxic.

Where on earth is the improvement going to come from? Who's going to inspire and elicit it?

The crowd is trying but it's like a one sided relationship at the moment.

tufc si wrote:We all know Brucie is'nt exactly Mr Popular around here and couldnt give two hoots about getting on the wrong side of posters, but I often occasionally do find myself agreeing with some of the drivel he spouts (in my head anyway)!

Anyone can look good in a press conference/meeting, as long as you say the right things and come accross as though you believe in every word you say, but it is ultimately the results and how he acts as a manager that will matter. He needs to deliver what he's said, other wise he's just going to end up like another Hargreaves!! He does look pretty smitten with getting the role though and seems like a thoroughly intelligent and decent bloke.

Totally disregard Brucies crap players comment. We have the foundations of a decent young side, they are just leaderless at present and massively lack confidence. If he can turn that around we'll be fine and dandy I'm sure.

Enjoy your game tomorrow Brucie, I don't think you'll be missed in the yellow stands at all mate.