TorquayFans.com | Torquay United Fans Forum

steve breed wrote:There are exceptional circumstances here so before the masses burn the board to the stake the boy has had an awful personal tragedy in his life.So on this one please give the lad and the club a break. stephen

Personal tragedy?

Don't we all suffer those at certain points in our lifetime? I have and I haven't asked my employer to let me go because of it. You man up and carry on.

After an employer has looked after you, paid you and helped you to recover from injury. Does it not leave a sour taste in the mouth to see him leg it because of a "personal tragedy"?

Seriously, this club has no bollocks.

When people refer to Torquay as being a nice friendly little club, they're not being kind. They're basically saying what a pushover we are.

Would your job be that important if you'd lost a child?

Would your employer be lacking bollocks if he allowed you to quit your job because of it?

Southampton Gull wrote:Would your job be that important if you'd lost a child?

Would your employer be lacking bollocks if he allowed you to quit your job because of it?

You're asking the wrong man. In 2004 when my 12 day old son died, I returned to work after 4 days off.
Life goes on, I didn't quit my job because it helped me escape from the misery of everyone around me.

I'd say I asked the right man. He just had a different way of dealing with it. I apologise if I caused any upset.

We all cope with tragedy in different ways. Your coping mechanism was to keep busy (as is mine for that matter), but other people cope in other ways.
We can't judge other people on how we do things, regardless of the similarities.

Scott Brehaut wrote:We all cope with tragedy in different ways. Your coping mechanism was to keep busy (as is mine for that matter), but other people cope in other ways.
We can't judge other people on how we do things, regardless of the similarities.

So quitting your job is the answer? Bloody hell, what a society we live in.

Watch him turn up elsewhere before the end of the season.
He's been looked after and nursed back to fitness then ditched us. Poor.

Quitting his job because he feels too distraught to think about football is his choice just as yours was to go back to work. I'm pretty sure that work would be the last thing on my mind if I was in his position. Beating on the club because of it is totally senseless.

It is difficult to make any call on this without knowing the actual circumstances, but if he (Fairhurst) has lost someone close to him (we don't know whether that is the case, or not) then it must be HIS choice as to how he deals with it. I just hope that the club gave him the option, to maybe go away for a few weeks and come back when he felt the time was right for him (rather than rush into an emotional decision he might regret later) like they did when they allowed Duane Oforie Achiempong compassionate leave when his sister died around this time last year.

I understand that on a scale of 1 to 10 in terms of personal tragedies this one is a 10.Show compassion he deserves our utmost sympathy and understanding at this time.

It's not worse than what happened to Scotty Rendell (it couldn't be) and he had about a fortnight off. Obviously very sad, but quitting your job because someone died? Really? Really really really? I thought it was a man's game. I get he gives it all the mouth about being a hard nut when he's with his mates or down the pub, trying to impress a girl.

Where have all the real men gone?

Matt.

ferrarilover wrote:It's not worse than what happened to Scotty Rendell (it couldn't be) and he had about a fortnight off. Obviously very sad, but quitting your job because someone died? Really? Really really really? I thought it was a man's game. I get he gives it all the mouth about being a hard nut when he's with his mates or down the pub, trying to impress a girl.

Where have all the real men gone?

Matt.

Glad it's not just me then.

ferrarilover wrote: Where have all the real men gone?

This attitude is everything that is wrong with the world, what happened to being more evolved than the neanderthals? Your decrying of a man for showing emotion is PRECISELY what leads to people dying, so way to go on considering yourself as intelligent, moron.

ferrarilover wrote:It's not worse than what happened to Scotty Rendell (it couldn't be) and he had about a fortnight off. Obviously very sad, but quitting your job because someone died? Really? Really really really? I thought it was a man's game. I get he gives it all the mouth about being a hard nut when he's with his mates or down the pub, trying to impress a girl.

Where have all the real men gone?

Matt.

You're all heart Matt.The tragedy is compounded by the fact he lives away from his family in Sheffield..He needs to be back in the family home and I would imagine,given the circumstances,wouldn't want or be able to be based back here, for a number of weeks.

Behind-the-Gulls wrote: You're all heart Matt.The tragedy is compounded by the fact he lives away from his family in Sheffield..He needs to be back in the family home and I would imagine,given the circumstances,wouldn't want or be able to be based back here, for a number of weeks.

NO HE'S NOT A REAL MAN, HE'S PROBABLY ONE OF THEM HOMOFAGGOTS, GOD I MISS THE DAYS WHEN WE COULD LYNCH THEM, UG UG UG. MAYBE YOU'RE ONE OF THEM TOO IF YOU THINK PEOPLE MIGHT DARE TO HAVE EMOTIONS!!!

madgull wrote: This attitude is everything that is wrong with the world, what happened to being more evolved than the neanderthals? Your decrying of a man for showing emotion is PRECISELY what leads to people dying, so way to go on considering yourself as intelligent, moron.

Codswallop.

He can show all the emotion he likes. No one says he shouldn't show some emotion, but his response needs to be proportional. Millions die every year, some in horribly tragic circumstances. How many grown men quit their jobs, give up on the only profession they have because of it?

If I was that way inclined, I'd tell war stories now, about soldiering on despite abysmal tragedy. But I'm not, so I won't.

Emotion yes, gross overreaction no.

Matt.