TorquayFans.com | Torquay United Fans Forum

What do you do with a sick chemist?


If you can't helium, you gotta carium, or barium



HAHAHAHAHAHA!!

It's not the "Get pissed on your favourite drink and talk shit" thread

Come off it - that's a brilliant joke! Drunk or not

(which for the record, I'm not)

Then you probably should be lol.

Considering the usual standard of rhese 'jokes', that one is not too bad, though sick chemists may not appreciate it.. :~D

Q: Which population group suffers the highest incidence of Bi-Polar Disorder?

A: Schizophrenic Poles..


Yes, I know....

Some quality needed on here, the latest offerings have been dire.........



I heard a knock on the door, when I answered it there was a 3'3" dwarf stood there.
"Who are you?" I asked
"The metre man" he replied...........

My Korean girlfriend just made me a pie from scratch.............



I'm fookin' gutted, I loved that dog....................

Women teachers! (Sorry but I couldn't resist this one!)

This is great..!!

Miriam, an elderly lady, goes up to a man at a bus stop in Finchley in north west London.

She tugs on the sleeve of his coat and asks, "Farshtayn Yiddish?"

The man answers, "Yes, Ich Farshtay."

Miriam then says, "Vot Time is It?"

In other countries what people see on their computer screens is in their own language. But in the UK we always see American mis-spellings and grammatical inaccuracies (for example, 'favorites'). Why can't we have these presented in our own language: proper English? Shouldn't be that difficult to arrange. For that matter why can't the Americans speak and spell English properly? The fact that the English themselves are distorting their own language in an even worse way is of course irrelevant..

I blame Tony Blair: 'Education, education, education..!!' Anyway, some of us don't need none, but it's time the rest of yous was taut...

Gullscorer wrote:In other countries what people see on their computer screens is in their own language. But in the UK we always see American mis-spellings and grammatical inaccuracies (for example, 'favorites'). Why can't we have these presented in our own language: proper English? Shouldn't be that difficult to arrange. For that matter why can't the Americans speak and spell English properly? The fact that the English themselves are distorting their own language in an even worse way is of course irrelevant..

I blame Tony Blair: 'Education, education, education..!!' Anyway, some of us don't need none, but it's time the rest of yous was taut...

Rong fred agen, dis iz de jooc fred.
And yes, I also cannot stand the influx of American English but moan about it on the correct thread please.

Ooops...!!
I did mean to put that post on the 'Whing, Rant and Moan' thread... :Oops:
I get confused because both threads have long titles... =Z

Barstaff required for Glasgow pub, must be flexible and work on a rota..........







:slap: Ouch.