Page 1 of 1

Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 03 Oct 2011, 21:45
by Kinky John Fowler
Can I ask you all please to gather round, sit down, relax, take the weight off...Uncle Kinks is going to tell you all a little story about favouritism and fairness.

Are we all ready? Ok then, here we go. Take a look at the picture below: (edit, I havent got a clue if you can see the picture or not)
Bruvva's.jpg
Bruvva's.jpg (10.4 KiB) Viewed 1228 times
Thats me and my brother in our teens and I know what your thinking, yes!!..we are a good looking pair of mofo's, thing is, my brother (on the left) is a bit slow, isnt quite as handsome as me and has a serious inferiority complex. My mother adores him though, much more than me. I think she felt guilty for dropping him on is head as an infant, she believed she was at fault for all his problems so he always got preferential treatment.

When it was his 13th birthday he was given a Sega Master System, I never got snazzy presents like that...I thought to myself "this isnt fair"...I chose my moment carefully, approached my mum and asked her if I could have a Sega Mega Drive for my birthday, her response was "(sigh)yeeeeees darling" so I punched the air with delight. 7 months later, on my birthday, I rushed downstairs to unwrap my first ever computer games console and what did I find...F*** ALL!! Nobody remembered my birthday again so I thought "sod this load of old b*ll*cks!" and turned to Cider...yummy yummy Cider. The moral of this story is something about treating people equally or stuff along those lines. Capeesh!

yours

Kinky John Fowler
A Bristol City fan

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 03 Oct 2011, 22:14
by Trojan 67
John, I don't for a moment believe that's you and bruv. :no:

So what makes them look alike I 'ear you say ?

Is it the League Cup alongside the FA Cup ?

:no: The League Cup has three handles.

It's the FA Cup for sure, alongside the big handles of the European Champions League Cup. ;-) :nod:

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 04 Oct 2011, 15:27
by ferrarilover
Michael Poke, surely?

And, KJF, you most certainly cannot!

I don't mean to be mean, but having seen the Blackpool game on the FLS, you guys are in a spot of bother this season. The defending was pure comedy gold. Do you think you can turn it round?

Matt.

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 04 Oct 2011, 15:36
by usagullmichigan
Kinky John Fowler wrote:Can I ask you all please to gather round, sit down, relax, take the weight off...Uncle Kinks is going to tell you all a little story about favouritism and fairness.

Are we all ready? Ok then, here we go. Take a look at the picture below: (edit, I havent got a clue if you can see the picture or not)
Bruvva's.jpg
Thats me and my brother in our teens and I know what your thinking, yes!!..we are a good looking pair of mofo's, thing is, my brother (on the left) is a bit slow, isnt quite as handsome as me and has a serious inferiority complex. My mother adores him though, much more than me. I think she felt guilty for dropping him on is head as an infant, she believed she was at fault for all his problems so he always got preferential treatment.

When it was his 13th birthday he was given a Sega Master System, I never got snazzy presents like that...I thought to myself "this isnt fair"...I chose my moment carefully, approached my mum and asked her if I could have a Sega Mega Drive for my birthday, her response was "(sigh)yeeeeees darling" so I punched the air with delight. 7 months later, on my birthday, I rushed downstairs to unwrap my first ever computer games console and what did I find...F*** ALL!! Nobody remembered my birthday again so I thought "sod this load of old b*ll*cks!" and turned to Cider...yummy yummy Cider. The moral of this story is something about treating people equally or stuff along those lines. Capeesh!

yours

Kinky John Fowler
A Bristol City fan
Bet you guys couldn't run very fast :lol:

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 04 Oct 2011, 17:11
by Plymouth Gull
Kinky John Fowler wrote:Can we have ling"

Is this some hidden message?

No. :-D

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 04 Oct 2011, 17:18
by Trojan 67
ferrarilover wrote:Michael Poke, surely?

And, KJF, you most certainly cannot!

I don't mean to be mean, but having seen the Blackpool game on the FLS, you guys are in a spot of bother this season. The defending was pure comedy gold. Do you think you can turn it round?

Matt, the girly guy with an orange car.

Nick, MTGGWAOC spotted the not so well hidden message first.

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 05 Oct 2011, 12:49
by Plymouth Gull
Steal my thunder, why don't you?! :(

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 22 Oct 2011, 21:05
by Kinky John Fowler
ferrarilover wrote:Michael Poke, surely?

And, KJF, you most certainly cannot!

Matt.

I dont know how that happened, :-o what must you think of me? =D
ferrarilover wrote: I don't mean to be mean, but having seen the Blackpool game on the FLS, you guys are in a spot of bother this season. The defending was pure comedy gold. Do you think you can turn it round?
I think you have been quite charitable with your description 'a spot of bother', we have been utterly appalling. Whether we can turn it around will depend on what the new boss can do and if he has the ability to spit shine and polish a t*rd. Tomorrow will be interesting as we are already 5 points from safety. Lets put it this way, I wouldnt rush down to the bookies to put money on us getting promotion. :-D

Hows things going for you guys?
KJF

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 22 Oct 2011, 21:21
by Scottish Gull
KJF

McInnes shone in a poor league (the utter p**h i have to watch week in week out) with the supposed big two Celtic and Rangers in a spot of bother themselves, ones under-preforming and the others facing administration, with their owner suing the beeb. Don't get me wrong though the guy has got natural talent in terms of management but your directors are taking a bit of a risk. The reason I say this is because BC is only his second management position, and although gaining promotion to the SPL back in 09 and retaining that status, its all he's really done of note! For me he's still a rookie sorry but thats just my personal view! Here's a wiki page bout him to back my stats up - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derek_McInnes" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 22 Oct 2011, 21:30
by Plymouth Gull
Could be better, KJF. We haven't won since the first weekend in September. Spineless performances, moreso on our travels, at Shrewsbury - I was there and I've never seen a Torquay side look so defeated, there was no fight or anything, poorest I've ever seen. And now we seem to enjoy conceding goals so much that we've conceded 9 in a week, (2-5 then 4-1 today), which isn't good enough, obviously. We're slipping down at a fairly alarming rate in my opinion, and I can't see where the next win is coming from, personally. We have home games against AFC Wimbledon, who lost 5-2 at home today so we'll probably get the backlash on Tuesday), and Hereford, who sit 23rd, I think. We need 4/6 points out of these two, just to stop the slide. The feelgood factor has diminished around the club, as has the winning mentality - that was one thing Buckle had instilled while here, and it's something I miss, if I'm honest.

:(

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 22 Oct 2011, 21:43
by Kinky John Fowler
Scottish Gull wrote:KJF

McInnes shone in a poor league (the utter p**h i have to watch week in week out) with the supposed big two Celtic and Rangers in a spot of bother themselves, ones under-preforming and the others facing administration, with their owner suing the beeb. Don't get me wrong though the guy has got natural talent in terms of management but your directors are taking a bit of a risk. The reason I say this is because BC is only his second management position, and although gaining promotion to the SPL back in 09 and retaining that status, its all he's really done of note! For me he's still a rookie sorry but thats just my personal view! Here's a wiki page bout him to back my stats up - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derek_McInnes" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Thats a fair shout Scottish Gull, to be honest I didnt know anything about the guy until we were linked with him. The problem is I think all the potential candidates we had for the job (Mark Robins definately, Dave Jones and Sean O' Driscoll possibly, maybe) came with a certain degree of risk. Its produced alot of hope amongst many City fans but like you say, he is very much a rookie in the managerial business. I suppose at the moment at least we cant get much worse. Its going to be interesting.

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 22 Oct 2011, 21:57
by Scottish Gull
Wish you guys luck and hopefully the risk works out for you. Out of the other 3 i would've taken Dave Jones, probably because thats the only one i know of! your right there wouldn't like to be bottom of the league like.

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 22 Oct 2011, 21:59
by Kinky John Fowler
NickGull wrote:Could be better, KJF. We haven't won since the first weekend in September. Spineless performances, moreso on our travels, at Shrewsbury - I was there and I've never seen a Torquay side look so defeated, there was no fight or anything, poorest I've ever seen. And now we seem to enjoy conceding goals so much that we've conceded 9 in a week, (2-5 then 4-1 today), which isn't good enough, obviously. We're slipping down at a fairly alarming rate in my opinion, and I can't see where the next win is coming from, personally. We have home games against AFC Wimbledon, who lost 5-2 at home today so we'll probably get the backlash on Tuesday), and Hereford, who sit 23rd, I think. We need 4/6 points out of these two, just to stop the slide. The feelgood factor has diminished around the club, as has the winning mentality - that was one thing Buckle had instilled while here, and it's something I miss, if I'm honest.

:(
NickGull

Im hoping for your sake that this is your bad run for the season that all teams seem to get and that things start improving for you soon. I hope this primarily because your a really good set of guys but just as importantly because Ive got some cold hard cash on you finishing above Bristol Wotsits.

Oh, and well done for also spotting my fiendishly well hidden message in the original post that was masquerading as a story of childhood trauma. Id have gotten away with it if it wasnt for you meddlin kids. :-D

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 22 Oct 2011, 22:14
by Plymouth Gull
I hope that too. Ha, cheers, but it seems I was beaten to it. :(

Anyway, as for you guys, I reckon McInnes is a good option for now. Hope you guys get out of it as we need some Westcountry clubs in the top divisions!!

Re: Kinky John's Drunken Storytime

Posted: 23 Oct 2011, 01:49
by ferrarilover
Bloody right you were beaten to it Nick!

KJF,

I'll have a watch of your match today and see what I think, then perhaps you'd be good enough to tell us all how normal that performance is so we can get an idea of what you guys watch every week?

Matt.